About this Video:

• Video Title: CPTSD: Breaking The Toxic Shame/Procrastination Cycle With Self-Compassion
• Channel: Heidi Priebe
• Speakers: Heidi Priebe
• Duration: 00:38:08

Introduction:

This video explores the connection between toxic shame, complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD), and procrastination. Heidi Priebe explains how these factors can create a self-defeating cycle and offers strategies using self-compassion and self-understanding to break this cycle. She emphasizes that while the concepts are most applicable to those with CPTSD, many can relate to the described patterns.

Key Takeaways:

• The Procrastination-Shame Cycle: Procrastination is presented as a symptom of underlying toxic shame, a belief that personal flaws cause life's problems.
• Secure vs. Insecure Responses to Stress: Secure individuals cope with stressors through self-compassion, seeking support and problem-solving strategies. Those with toxic shame/CPTSD often fail to recognize their need for support, leading to dysregulation and maladaptive coping.
• Dysregulation and Maladaptive Coping: Unmet needs for comfort and support cause dysregulation, hindering problem-solving. This leads to maladaptive coping mechanisms (e.g., substance use, isolation) which worsen the situation.
• The Role of Self-Compassion: Self-compassion and self-understanding are crucial in breaking the cycle. Acknowledging the need for comfort, validating feelings, and reframing negative self-talk are key steps.
• Reframing Negative Thoughts: Instead of blaming oneself, individuals should analyze the root causes of their problems, recognizing that these are often the result of past trauma and learned coping mechanisms. Connecting with others who have similar experiences can reduce feelings of shame and isolation.

The video mentions several maladaptive coping mechanisms used to address unmet needs for comfort, including:

• Taking drugs to improve concentration.
• Creating conflict with a partner to elicit comfort, followed by receiving comfort afterward.
• Isolating oneself to avoid others seeing one's struggles and prevent potential abandonment.
• Acting tough and strong, repressing feelings, and engaging in self-destructive behaviors (e.g., binge eating or excessive drinking) at the end of the day to relieve pressure.

These are presented as responses to dysregulation resulting from unmet needs for comfort and support.