what women actually find attractive

About this video

• Video Title: what women actually find attractive
• Channel: Get Better
• Speakers: None explicitly named
• Duration: 00:07:40

Overview

This video discusses common misconceptions men have about what women find attractive. It aims to clarify that attraction is not solely based on physical appearance or a science-backed formula, but rather a complex interplay of narrative, personality, and relative factors. The video encourages men to focus on understanding the female perspective and authentically expressing themselves rather than trying to fit idealized molds.

Key takeaways

• The Male vs. Female Gaze: Men often approach attractiveness from a male perspective, focusing on traits like masculinity and ruggedness, which may not align with what women find appealing.
• Narrative and Storytelling: Women are drawn to men who convey a compelling narrative through their grooming, posture, and interactions, similar to how they engage with romance stories and artistic expression.
• Appearance is Varied: While certain physical traits like a sharp jaw, lean body, and a balance of masculine and feminine features are generally attractive, women's preferences vary significantly by ethnicity and physique.
• Beyond the Physical: True attraction for women is not solely about looks. Confidence, security, self-validation, and a sense of mystery are crucial elements that contribute to a man's appeal.
• Dynamic Attraction: Unlike instant attraction men might experience, women's desire often builds over time through getting to know a person.
• Relative vs. Absolute Standards: What women consider tall or high-earning is often relative to themselves, meaning a man doesn't need to meet extreme absolute standards to be attractive.
• Niche Appeal Over Mass Appeal: It's more effective to lean into and maximize one's unique interests and lifestyle to attract compatible partners rather than trying to appeal to everyone.
• Kindness vs. Weakness: Women are not turned off by kindness, but rather by weakness disguised as kindness, such as excessive eagerness to please or desperation. Assertiveness and self-respect are more attractive.
• Qualities Behind Success: When wealth is attractive, it's often the underlying qualities like drive, discipline, and vision that are appealing, not just the money itself.